Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
not a creature was stirring ‘cept Rizzo the mouse.
Scrooge slept in his bed played by Michael bleedin’ Caine,
When the Marleys visited wrapped in their chains.
They spoke of a night filled with three haunting spectres,
All played by muppets with Brian Henson as director.
Kermit was Bob Cratchit and Piggy his wife,
Gonzo as Dickens narrating Scrooge’s strife.
And gathered round the table reviewing this flick,
Was Brose, Jade, Matt and Trev (Stu was sick).
Did we like the songs, does the film deserve it’s rep?
Only way to tell is to download this ep.
Merry Christmas from the team at Chatflix.
By Crom! We’re finally reviewing Conan the Barbarian! Arnie pays the title character who seeks revenge on James Earl Jones character ‘Doom’ for the death of his parents... wait.. that’s Batman’s origin! Is Conan really Batman? The Chatflix set out for Cimmeria to find the answer to this question.. and only this question on this weeks ep!
People getting hard. A slithering snake in a secret chamber, waving of wands and a moaning Myrtle. No we haven’t started reviewing adult films, we’ve returned to Hogwarts for Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Translated directly from Parseltongue join Brose, Jade, Matt O’Neill and Kirsty O’Connor in their defence against the Dark Arts and Crafts class and find out if they give the film a 9 3/4 out of 10!
A chosen one sets out on a journey to bring a balance to the universe. Along the way fighting an evil empire after after being trained by wise old mystics.
Sooo its like Star Wars but with puppets? Exactly!
Jim Henson’s The Dark Crystal combines epic narratives with creature designs that gave adult men nightmares. Not any specific men. Definitely not any men who’s name starts with T. finishes with revor. Nope. Those Skeksies didn’t scare him at all.
Excuse me. I need to go check under the bed for monsters.
Brose dons the hat and whip with sassy bombshell Stu, sidekick Danielle and witch doctor in training, special guest Stephen Hall to talk Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.
A film very close to our hearts.. which have been ripped out and are currently been in held by Mola Ram. So join us for a refreshing dinner chat where we serve opinions, facts, observations and of course monkey brains.
The Love Guru is about loving people for who they are.. but not even a mother could love this film.. Also we’re not sure that’s what this film is about, we refused to watch it to write this description. Instead we made Man Bites God watch it. They will tell you about it so you also don’t have to watch it
Blade Runner 2049 is the dystopian future sequel that sees Ryan Gosling ignore his mothers advice about running with sharp objects. Will professional crotchety old man Harrison Ford slap some sense in to him? And how will we know what Jarod Leto’s character is if it’s not tattooed on his forehead? The Chatflix crew answer none of these questions
Did you know it’s such a man's world that even successful women in Hollywood are actually played by men. Cate Blanchett? Actually James Franco. Julia Roberts? A character invented by Robert De Niro! Emma Stone is actually Ryan Gosling, shooting La La Land was reeeeeally hard.
Where did they all get the idea? Dustin Hoffman’s Tootsie! Where struggling sharp tongued actor Dustin becomes sassy and loved actress Dustin. In a time when trans wasn’t a thing this film is about a man learning the lesson that women are actually PEOPLE! I was shocked too! Some presidents STILL haven’t learned that lesson..
Join Brose, Matt, Shaun and Hayley Tantau in a little soap opera we call Chatflix
This film contains neither David Bowie or Captain Hook and therefore Trev was very confused why they called this film Pan’s Labyrinth. To be fair he also found the Spanish hard to.. oh wait there were subtitles? Well that makes it easier. Guillermo Del Toro directed Hellboy though so it’s as pretty as all get out. The Chatflix gang ignore Trev’s ramblings and discuss this visual tour de force
Tell me if you've heard this one. A Bat and a Cat walk into a sequel and bring a scene eating Penguin and.. a brilliant. Christopher.. Walken!
Trev jumps into the Bat-hosting chair with his Boy Wonder Brose as they are joined with Dale Maccanti from Trev's comic After the Snow and Have You Been Paying Attention and Utopia actor Dilruk Jayasinha.
Tune in to see if we think this film is Purrrrfect or a Harp from Hell.
A grim and gritty reboot of Batman from Pee Wee Herman director Tim Burton and starring Mister Mom's Michael Keaton, what could possibly go wrong? Jade, Brose, Trev, and James squeeze into the black rubber suits and gather in the batcave to dance with the devilishly successful Batman 89 in the pale moonlight. What do these Jokers have to say about it?
Find out same chat time, same chat channel
Great Scott! Before we go Back to the Future with the new Blade Runner sequel we chat about Ridley Scott’s original Blade Runner.
Jade, Danielle Chau, Darren McFarlane, and Brose… or their replicants gather around the mics to question their own existence like tears in the rain and the distant future of 2019. We’ve got 2 years to get androids and flying cars people! Get on it! Harrison Ford is gonna be so pissed if we don’t get all this sorted soon.
You should also rate and review us on iTunes. Rutger Hauer said you should and he isn’t someone you want to ignore. Remember Blind Fury? He was a blind guy with a sword. Go to your local Blockbuster and grab it. It’s awesome.
Dracula sucks! But only because he's a vampire.
Matt, Shaun, Andy and Brose gather around their garlic pizza and medium rare stakes to chat about Francis Ford Coppolla's Dracula film.
It's a film where all the English actors pretend to be European and all the American actors pretend to be English.
Keanu Reeves plays Johnny "Utah" Harker who discovers his new friend Vlad isn't actually who he says he is. Sadly there is no surfing on coffins but there IS Monica Bellucci!
Meanwhile does anyone remember that MTV awards where Adam West and Frank Gorshin did a parody of Interview with a vampire? It was the best and I hope you all track it down on youtube.
Also don't forget to rate and review us on iTunes and let us know if you actually read these descriptions!
You know why we’re watching Reservoir Dogs? Because I said so. Matt wanted to pick his own movie. No way, no way. Tried it once, it doesn't work. You get four guys all fighting over which movie they want, but they don't know each other, so nobody wants to back down. No way. I pick!
The Chatflix crew assemble in an abandoned lounge room to talk about our first Tarantino film, and as we look at the stellar cast including Tim Roth, Harvey Keitel and Michael Madsen, fast dialogue and killer sound track we begin to suspect one of us is… Brose (turns out it was Brose)
The Chatflix team are killing it this week by diving into the Zodiac killer mystery. David Fincher opens the serial killer box again inviting Robert Downey Jr, Mark Ruffalo, Anthony Edwards and Jake Gyllenhaal. Will the gang like this tale of true crime or will we find it as confusing as one of the killers notes.
Luc Besson’s high octane space opera finally comes to Chatflix where we pull out our multi passes and travel into the 23rd century where cabbies and priests team up with a cosmic weapon to beat Evil and chew up ALL the scenery.
During World War II, while all the troops were fighting that Hitler fella, there was nobody left to play baseball. You would think that was a good thing but America is odd, so they formed a women's league... to see if it was baseball that was boring or the fact men were playing it... or something... Our very own league of left fields, pinch hitters and base stealers assemble on the Chatflix pitchers mound to talk about the film about those proud women. With not one, but two guest panelists; Upper Moddle Bogan star Michala Banas and Utopia's Toby Truslove joining Brose and Danielle. A League of Their Own may smack our team out of the park or we may think it's a foul ball.
After a few weeks of films about aliens the Chatflix team settle down to a nice film set on Earth. Two Governors (Arnold Schwarzenegger & Jesse Ventura) and CIA agent Apollo Creed are hired by the U.S. government to secretly rescue a group of politicians trapped in Guatemala. But when they land in Central America the group discovers they are being hunted by a brutal creature with superhuman strength and the ability to disappear into its surroundings.. Son of a B! Another alien movie!
They call it The Sneakeratoir…No wait! The Hunteringtor? How about the Predator? That works!
Directed by action movie virtuoso John Mc Teirnan, the film was so successful it spawned sequels, reboots as well as crossing over to the Alien universe so settle in, switch on your heat vision and enjoy as we get all hot and excited about Predator.
Ridley Scott returns to tell the story of-SHHHH! Whatever you do don't tell Trev! He hasn't seen it yet! He's definitely not listening to this episode which is choc full of Covenant convo and spoilers! Someone told him Stu, Brose and Caity were on this ep and that was already too big a spoiler! He hopes this film is the Men in Black / Aliens crossover he's been hoping for.
The progenitor of the Alien franchise, Ridley Scott, returns to reveal the origins of the perfect killing machine as well as the origins of the Weyland-Yutani company, personally I’m hoping it’s less mayhem and acid blood and more corporate financial structuring, bylaws and tax concessions.
Will there be eggs? will there be drooling creatures? Yes there will be and that’s just the pre-Chatflix recording breakfast! Join Jade, Brose, Caity and an android version of Stu as we explore Prometheus.
Jade’s on the show and Brose is the man,
Does whatever a co-host can.
Can he swing from a web?
Of course he can’t but Spider-Man can!
Look out! Here Comes a Spider-Maaaan!
Your friendly neighbourhood Chatflix team including Trev and Shaun swing back into action to talk about Sam Raimi’s beloved 2002 version of Spider-Man 15 years after its release and just a few months before we get yet another reboot!
Does it hit the heights that a wall crawler should climb, Does it measure up to the legacy of the comic? Who created Spider-Man anyway? All this and more is discussed with the same enthusiasm J. Jonah Jameson has for a headline!
We all thought Ripley was dead. We all hoped she was because otherwise it meant this film existed. Unfortunately it does so we've created clones of ourselves to talk about this Joss Whedon penned... something.
Ripley is back as a ultimate alien killing machine after being revived as a part alien clone of herself (don't try and understand it, just go with it). This time she's joined by space pirates! Space pirates including the eternal waif Wynona Rider and Hellboy himself Ron Perlman!
Join us as we climb through vents, tunnels and massive plotholes to talk about Alien Ressurection!
Is this a film with which you should f#%*?
Trev isn’t sure he’s ever seen this film. Steve Martin is in it. His character’s name is probably George. He looks like a George. Trev also thought there was a flamboyant character played by Balky from Perfect Strangers, Brose informs him that it’s actually Martin Short. Trev can tell you it’s about a wedding. George’s son/daughter is getting married to someone. He’s relatively confident that hilarity ensues with just the right amount of saccharine sweetness. He also suspects there’s a scene where someone goes to the bathroom and there’s a wedding swan in the bath! HA!
You know who HAS seen this film? Brose, Jade, Leisl and Michael Chamberlin. Join them as they look at the 1991 film Father of the Bride.
Brose, Jade, Caity and Trev, Chatflix's four street rats brave the streets Agrabad to look at the story of Aladdin. The Disney classic animated film that may be the most singalongable film ever made!
With the irrepressible Robin Williams as the magically loveable Genie and songs by Mencken, Ashman & Rice You aint never had friends like us.
David Fincher presents his vision of the ultimate warrior woman: Sigourney Weaver's Ripley! This time it's in a space prison and those hardened criminals have nothing on the Ripper. The biggest fight club, however, happened behind the scenes. 8 writers vs the producers!
Join Stu, Brose, Caity, and Danielle on the space chain gang as they try to avoid dropping the soap while the Xenomorphs are around.